((I went on a wet 'n wild trip...and I got dehydrated really bad...throwing up and being sick and stuff. To make things worse, this girl (awww) bought me a water bottle, and I drank most of it before we got home. Then, I had to pee really bad, and we still had like 15 or so minutes. I told Coach, and he said, "Sorry, we can't stop yet, you'll have to wait." Well, this was on a Saturday...so we had school the next Monday...and of course I had German))
Liz: Ooh man, I don't feel very good.
Katy: Are you going to throw up?
Katy: Herr! Liz is gonna throw up!
Liz: Thanks. *stands up*
Coach: Again? You know, Liz got dehydrated and threw up, and then she had to go pee all the way home. Well, not all the way home...
((This one was on the way home from a swim trip))
Liz: *whispers to friend* I have to pee...
Friend: Tell Coach!
Liz: Can you tell him for me?
Friend: Coach, Liz has to ask you something.
Liz: I'm not yelling it!
Coach: Liz...let's not play this game again. How long can you hold it in?
Liz: I don't know!
~*He told the bus driver to pull over at a rest stop*~
Coach: We're almost there. Think of something else. Not waterfalls (yeah...thanks...)
Coach: NOBODY GET OFF! THIS IS JUST FOR LIZ! You go girl!
Coach: I think you and #1 Limper (my "swim team nickname) should join Water Polo.
Friend: Remember that one year? I got kicked in the eye!
Friend: It hurt!
Coach: Well of course it hurt. Limper #1 was hurt for 4 months, and she's fine. Okay, not fine, but she's okay. She'll be fine.
This boy on the swim team: Hah.
((Remember my saying about his "international signs"?))
Friend: *Holding a pizza box*
Liz: *steals the pizza box*
Friend: Hit him with the pizza box.
Coach: Don't hit me with the pizza box! International sign for don't hit me with the pizza box!
Liz: What is it?
Coach: I don't know yet...
Boy on swim team: *picks up horseshoe...upside down*
Coach: LOOK WHAT YOU DID! YOU JUST POURED ALL MY LUCK ONTO THE DESK! IT TOOK 6 MONTHS TO COLLECT THAT LUCK, AND LOOK WHAT YOU DID!
Boy: Sorry coach. *tries to scoop up the "luck" off the desk and into the horseshoe.
Coach: You can't fix it! GET OUT!
Liz: *stubbed my toe hard...just hopping around*
Girl on swim team: You'd better swim on this relay...If I have to do it, you do too.
Coach: She's fine. She does it all the time. Some people worry themselves with it, but I don't worry myself with it anymore. (Yeah, thanks coach)
Coach: Hey Liz. You just chillin' out?
Coach: Oh yeah! You have to take that test! Why didn't you say anything? You forgot, didn't you?
Coach: How's that going for you, being retarded?
Coach: I meant that in the best way possible.
Liz: Guess what!
Coach: The pope's catholic.
Liz: Yes...guess what else!
Coach: You're swimming this summer.
Liz: Yes...guess what else! I'm running for Senior Class Secretary!
Coach: YOU'RE running for Senior Class Secetary.
Liz: The Senior class is going to Hell in a handbasket.
Friend: You're losing your most dedicated swimmer!
Coach: I'm so glad she's leaving. I couldn't stand her! She was such a pain in the you-know-where.
Liz: *mouth drops*
Coach: You know I'm kidding, right?
Coach: You're not going to go around flopping around like a fish?
~*The day we T.P.ed his truck*~
Coach: LIZ AND ********! I KNOW YOU TOLIET PAPERED MY TRUCK!
(Friend took off (we were in the water) but I had nothing to do, so I just stood there, and he came over to me)
Coach: You'll be sorry. When you have a date to the prom, and your car is all shiny and clean...you'll regret it.
~*Later, me and friend sitting on bleachers. Stephanie is just sitting there, and I'm laughing my head off*~
CHS Coach (NOT German): I think it was those two.
Coach: I know. Look at Liz. You'd think she'd never done this before.
~*Passes by me, glaring, and I'm still giggling*~
Coach: Have you ever T.P.ed my room (classroom)?
Liz: I haven't I swear!
((His birthday was on Easter Break...so we decided to give him a surpise the day before. 2 of my friends and I got there early, called him to the office, and ran to his classroom with confetti, balloons, and a big poster that said "Happy Birthday!" I gave him a mug I made that said #1 Coach, and a Twix bar. I threw Confetti all over the floor and started to toliet paper all over when he walked in))
Coach: Hey! Call me to the office...*looks at the poster* Aww...it says Happy Birthday! *glares at one of my friends* But...there's candy, so that makes everything better...kind of.
~*Later, during my German class*~
Some kid in my German class: The janitors are going to be mad!
Coach: Yeah the janitor is going to be.....*looks at Liz* AHEM!
Girl: Who did it?
Liz: *raises her hand*
Coach: *pours confetti on Liz's head*
~*More might be coming!*~