Liz S. (elizajane86) wrote in germanquotebook,
Liz S.
elizajane86
germanquotebook

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Crazy Germans :P

Hey, I'm new here...and I had a German teacher who's also the swim coach (I just graduated from high school), and he says and does really crazy things...."Liz" is me, by the way...most of the time, unless I say different.

Coach: *blowing on this girl who just got out of the water*
Girl (forgot her name): Hey, stop that, I'm a tropical girl!
Coach: You're not a tropical girl!
Girl: *I forget, something about Hawaii or something...*
Coach: You ARE tropical. *turns to Liz* You're not tropical.
Liz: Nope.
Coach: You're a penguin.

~*Before Weights*~
*Friend and Liz waiting for class to start*
*Girl walks in late*
Coach: There you are! Where the hell have you been? *turns to other weights teacher* I was speaking in German. Hell means light.
Friend and Liz turn to each other and say: Where the light have you been?

He also has "international signs". He has an international sign for "No", "Get your groove on" and other things...pretty scary at times, especially when he's doing the international sign for "get your groove on" on the desk...

((I had this planned for some time...I wanted to say I was going to quit, and see Coach's reaction...bad idea))
Liz: *standing in front of classroom door, talking to Jessica* I changed my mind.
Jessica: What?
Liz: I'm quitting Swimming.
Coach: *not facing me, but does a quick 90 degree turn and looks at me, mouth wide open* What?! After all we've been through! I had to put up with YOU!
Liz: I'm kidding!
Coach: Yeah you're kidding! *somebody is talking to him* I'm in a bad mood now, because of LIZ!
~*later*~
*Cat and Liz walking down the hall behind him*
Cat : Hey, are you still mad at Liz?
Coach: *No answer*
Liz: See, he's mad, he won't even talk to me!
Coach: I'll talk to you Liz...*HISS!* I hope you fall down the stairs and break your head open and your brains fall out so I can SPIT on them!.....I hope you sprain your ankle. Again.

Liz: I'm so tired...
Coach: Are you sick too? Get it, sick and tired...heh heh heh...
Liz: I'm sick and tired of you.
Coach: *does the 90 degree stare again* Are you sure you're okay with saying things like that?
Liz: Yeah, I'm fine.

((Kay, beforehand, I had just gone to a thing that the Band members were invited to, and I was late for German))

Coach: About time you limped to class.
Katy: You should hear what happened to you!
Coach: Oh yeah, you got hit by a bus. I'm so sorry.
Liz: Yes!
~*Later*~
Liz: I got hit by a bus?
Katy: Yeah...hey, Herr (what she calls him), what was that noise you made of Liz getting hit by the bus?
Coach: thump thump thump thump...


*We had to write on a paper what we like on our pizza, and he was reading them while we waiting for the bell to ring to leave*
Coach: Liz, this is funny...you like Rabbit Bacon on your pizza?
Liz: I put that?
*I didn't hear the end of that for quite sometime...*

*Happened on a swim trip*
(I forgot all my money...)
Coach: You're set for today (Pizza party with the "host swimmers"). Do you want me to give you $5 for tomorrow.
Liz: *nods frantically*
Coach: Okay. That's 100% interest, figure it out by Monday, okay?
Liz: *nods again, laughing*

Liz: *laughing*
Coach: *glares*
Becky: Liz is making fun of you.
Coach: Liz always makes fun of me.
Becky: You should kick her out.
Coach: Alright, that's it, get out!
~*during swim practice, my mom shows up and I tell her that I got kicked out of class*~
Coach: I didn't kick you out of class! Did I?
Liz: Yeah you did, remember, I was making fun of you!
Coach: Oh yeah, and you'd better not make fun of me any more missy.
Mom: You used to be such a good girl, what happened?
Coach: She going stright down the path to you-know-where.

*~*Hope you enjoyed them, I'll think of more and post them!*~*
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This is hilarious!! I love it! Your Coach is really funny! I think that athletics coaches that teacher German are awesome. :-P :-D

Where the light have I been, eh?