The Girl on the Wing (spacemonkyqueen) wrote in germanquotebook,
The Girl on the Wing
spacemonkyqueen
germanquotebook

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Yay, lj cuts for all!



Frau Bloomberg (shouting angrily at the class): "Practice! This is practice! Do you understand word practice?"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "This is so American... 'There is a blanket hanging down.'... I love this."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "I introduced the future!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg (to Jeremy): "If you don't feel good you can step out... because you are pale."

~*~*~*~*~

Massod: "Arabic is Arabian, right?"
Frau Bloomberg: "Nein Massod... nein, nein, nein, nein."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Schul whore!? What is this!? It is Schuler!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Your lightbulb in your head is on, ya?"
Massod: "Yea but it's not a Phillip's lightbulb."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Sonja, you have to understand your own language... which is... Anglish."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "It just is not Mobil! It is Mobel! Mobil is American gas company!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Am Schwester! Am Schwester! Now you!"
Aaron: "Ummm... Best Western?"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "You can praise the salad."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "The salad is attractive.”

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Gentlemen... or Geoff."




Frau Bloomberg: "Again, just to probe the prepositional phrases."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Ruhe! Ruhe people..."
Translation: "Quiet! Quiet people..."
Jeremy: *talks*
Frau Bloomberg: "Jeremy... after Ruhe you just... speak."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Erin-ka, beautiful in the corner!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Andrew Pham is machine gun... they see him and will just be running away!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Now we know what lurks in your heart... machine guns."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "People are fleeing from the... fire and they are burning... and kinda in the river."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Both suggestions are kinda beautiful."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "People, people... ruhe, ruhe... detentions, detentions."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "This will be very detention."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Detention please, detention!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "I am not a wonderchild!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "We do not really want to have uprising among us here."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "These students who don't do anything will really be severely beaten!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: *points to head* "I just sometimes hear voices."




Frau Bloomberg (to Ashleigh): "Was ist this jaw?" *Frau grabs her own jaw and starts moving it around and making an unidentified noise*

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg (to Erica): "Were you really admiring Tom Miller?"
Erica: "Yes."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg (to Steve about understanding the classwork): "Steve if you cannot really get this then you will be really unemployed and really live under bridge... and you will not come out until you are the meister of the German."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "This is a massive invasion."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Geoff is the native."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Geoff, be my gatekeeper!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "My detentions are horrendous!!!!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Gently ask Melissa for advice."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Please be graceful to the sub."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "People, I really hear voices."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Please, be kind to eachodder."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: *answers the phone* "This is really wrong number please." *hangs up phone the wrong way*
Sue: *sitting next to phone* *hears -boop-boop-boop-if you would like to make a call, please hang up and try again- from phone* *gets up and puts phone back while Frau Bloomberg is not looking*
Class: *laughs*
Frau Bloomberg: "What?"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "The grapes are very heterogeneous."




Frau Bloomberg: "Do me sixteen Geoff."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Do I hear voices in the corner?"
Jeremy: "No they're all in your head."

~*~*~*~*~

(Some things are spelled the way they are said in this quote, it's not a typo.)
Frau Bloomberg: "There are strange cheaelk."
Sue: "A strange what?"
Frau Bloomberg: "A strange kalk."
Mike: "A strange chaaaaaaaaaaaalk."
Frau Bloomberg: "I just wanted to blame the strange spirits for stealing my chalk."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: (Sonja and Sara - the one from German 2 - are about to run an errand for Frau Bloomberg) "You must slip through the halls and slide so quietly and gently."

~*~*~*~*~

*reading from the book out loud in class
Frau Bloomberg: "Geoff, do for us... number fifteen."
Geoff (messing with Frau Bloomberg): "Look... I think I have the wrong book." *holds up German 1 book*
Frau Bloomberg: "OH MY GASH! Look at this lack of organization, can you imagine? The whole ten minutes we are reading and this Geoff has German 1 book!"
Russell: "Geoff, you could use that German 2 book in your desk... and look it's open to the right page."
Geoff: "Oh yea, imagine that."

~*~*~*~*~

Steve: *translates instructions from German to English in class* "You will question him-"
Frau Bloomberg: "-Question him? This is not interrogation!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "I spent so much time reviewing... so much time probing..."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg (to Russell): "Do you have any currency?"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg (on January 3, 2002): "Let's say that this is a 2002..."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Please, I cannot help you because I have a problems."




Frau Bloomberg (to Melissa): "You are just so exuberant if any male gets in your vicinity."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg (to Steve): "You are the native speaker, not me!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "How do you fight against all the seduction in the world?"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "What do you find in the dictionary?"

~*~*~*~*~

*new student (Patrick) walks into room and hands Frau Bloomberg his schedule*
Patrick: "Ah... I think I'm in this class."
Class: *laughs at Patrick's misfortune of being put into a class run by the psycho freak Frau Bloomberg*
Mike: "Switch out while you still can."
Sue: "Just turn and walk away."
Class: *sends random words of discouragement to him*
Patrick: "Well, this class looks pretty full... I think I'll switch out."
Frau Bloomberg: "This is not necessary... let us see how is your German."
Patrick: "Okay..."
Frau Bloomberg: "Kannst du auf Deutsch sagen mir... woher kommst du?"
Translation: Can you tell me in German... where you are from?
Patrick: *opens eyes really wide* "WHAT????"

(15 minutes later)

Patrick: "Um... Mrs... Frau... Bloomberg... can I have my schedule back now?"
Frau Bloomberg: "You will get it back at the end of the period."
Patrick: "But, I kind of need it-"
Frau Bloomberg: "-No, you do not need it until the end of the period."
Patrick: "But they told me to bring it back to them-"
Frau Bloomberg: "-You know, there is a thing... that is a first impression... It is very important and I am using it and it is becoming something that is... not a good."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "I will wash myself please."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "I will wash my head"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "I will wash my feet... it's necessary too."




Frau Bloomberg: "I worked there... where do you think it is?"
Andrew P.: "Oh, I know! Concentration camps!"
Frau Bloomberg: *scowls at Andrew* "Do not make that kinda... rude remark!" *continues to scowl*
Class: *laughs asses off*
Frau Bloomberg: *scowls at class*

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "I just couldn't believe this, the fish was fresh!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg (to Sonja): "You smoke, you take drugs, you drink, all kinda vices."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "What is your allergy?"
Andrew P.: "Sarin."
Frau Bloomberg: "What is this?"
Russell: *laughs* "Oh, I know what that is... it's like... nerve gas."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: *giving definitions in class* "This is... the ENEMY of the smoker."
Ashleigh: "You mean a non-smoker?"
Frau Bloomberg: "Ya, it could be that too."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: *tape is playing in Japanese class and class is trying to pay attention* "Now class, listen to and watch the TV."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "What is this hana?" (talking about a girl named Hannah)

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "If you don't know how to cook... then you just are scavenging."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Michael Sanders... he is always telling the stories about I was an elementary school teacher and he is hiding under the window... and he is a spymaster!"
Mike: *looks over at Sue and mouths the words 'I don't know what the hell she's talking about.'*

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "That's a lovely bread." *strokes bread*

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Re-poo-blick... re-poo-blick... re-poo-blick... poo poo."




Frau Bloomberg: "Andrew... your voice... is kinda... loud."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "I hear voices... very distinctive voices."
Steve: "Don't do what they tell you to do."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "They say 'This is a dysfunctional language, we didn't want that!'"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Just... go to your seat."
William: "This is a seat."
Frau Bloomberg: "Just... go somewhere... anywhere."

~*~*~*~*~

Andrew P.: *gets a question wrong and Frau Bloomberg goes crazy at him* *does push ups*
Frau Bloomberg: "Okay Andrew... we know your physical strengths."
Andrew P.: "No, I must punish myself!!!"
Sonja: "Three... four... five... six..."
Frau Bloomberg: "Andrew, do not entertain the class."
Mike: "ENTERTAIN THE CLASS!!!!"
Sonja: "Ten... eleven... twelve..."
Frau Bloomberg: "NO!!!!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "In English... you say, 'Tom, something was terrible... something was terrible... something was terrible...’"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: *walks into podium in classroom* *trips over overhead cord* *bumps into chair* "Gash!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Melissa is the MEEEEIIIIIIISTERIN!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Somebody is intensively talking."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Where do you go out to eat sometimes?"
Tom: "Outback steakhouse."
Frau Bloomberg: "Ubeck?"
Tom: "Outback."
Frau Bloomberg: "Ausveck?"
Tom: "Outback."
Class: "OUTBACK STEAKHOUSE!!!!"
Frau Bloomberg: *looks confused*
Tom: *writes it down on a piece of paper and shows it to her*
Frau Bloomberg: "Oh... outback."




Frau Bloomberg: "I smoke behind the school and I got into trouble."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Ich bin allergisch gegen..."
Translation: "I am allergic to..."
Geoff: "Schokolade."
Translation: "Chocolate.”
Frau Bloomberg: " SAY THE SENTENCE!"
Geoff: "BUT YOU JUST SAID IT!"
Frau Bloomberg: *scowls*
Geoff: *sarcastically* "Ich bin allergisch gegen schokolade!"

~*~*~*~*~

Eric: "Could I make a poster? You let other students make posters for extra credit!"
Frau Bloomberg: "No... this is not really possible for those students who do not do the homework."
Eric: *tries to get some kind of extra credit from Frau Bloomberg* "Maybe, over the winter break I could make many posters for some extra credit..."
Frau Bloomberg: *looks up as if to say 'What a good idea!'* "... Not really."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "It is time when it's not snowing."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "There is a strange density here."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "I would be fearful by myself in the park."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "What is the name of this popular singer... she is young British girl..."
Class: *guesses*
Sonja: "Britney Spears?"
Frau Bloomberg: "Brit... Britney Spears!"
Sue: "You know just because her name is Britney doesn't mean she's British."
Russell: "Ich bin ein slaaaaaaaave für dich."
Translation: "I'm a slaaaaaaaave for you."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: *opens classroom door and looks at students walking in the halls and talking* "... Frolicking in the halls..."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "I had been pretty."




Gwen: "Frau Bloomberg... if you had one word to describe yourself what would it be?"
Frau Bloomberg: "Irresistible!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Do you see how it is inflated?"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg (To Jeremy): "You just wake up when it comes to the alcohol and the cigarettes!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg (On Valentine's Day): "Try not to eat too many candies today, otherwise you will collapse!!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Oh Vrussell you really not so good grade like ‘A’ Gabby." (Russell and Gabby are both "A" students)
Russell: "I've got an 'A' too!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Several students I have to remind *says the next four words so fast that they sound like one word* thathomeworkmissingok."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "I would like you to now... do me this."
(on another note pretty much the whole class is waiting for her to say "Do me 69!")

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg (to Mike): "Please, I have a difficulties, you have to keep track of the door."

~*~*~*~*~

Gabby *translates from the book (she didn't just think this up and say it) aloud in class*: "I... I... feel myself...? I feel myself right everyday-"
Substitute teacher: " *interjects* -That's not it."
Gabby: "Yea... I'm just saying what it says."
Substitute teacher: "Anyone knows that you don't translate it literally."
Gabby: "Well then what am I supposed to say?"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "I don't like any X."

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "I eat myself right!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "How do you eat yourself?"




Frau Bloomberg: *translates vocabulary in class (or tries to with what little English she has)* "Fine mittlebrot means... *rubs thumb and index finger together as if she wants money* it is like the small... small corn."
(later)
Frau Bloomberg: "Ein Trager... ein Trager ist... *walksover to Mike and picks up blue wal-mart basket that he 'commandeered' and used to carry his books to class*... ein Trager ist... THIS!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg (to Zohair and mysterious dude who sent me the e-mail): "You know it is something about the boys... they are all zo technically gifted."

~*~*~*~*~

Tom: *reads aloud in class* "Sechs pfund-"
Frau Bloomberg: "No sex! SECHS!"
Steve L.: "Aww... no sex?"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: "Kakau, kakau, kakau!"
Mike: "Cow, cow, cow!"
Sue: “Remember when Frau Bloomberg called Mike Mickau?”
Melissa: “Oh, Mickau!!!! Mickau!!!!"

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg (to Mike): "Please, do not really... destroy this language."

~*~*~*~*~

Andrew C.: *tosses bouncy ball back and forth with Geoff and Steve during class while Frau Bloomberg is not looking*
Frau Bloomberg: "Andrew, stop playing with these balls!!!! You really must not do this."
Class: *begins laughing and Frau Bloomberg just cannot figure out why*

~*~*~*~*~

Frau Bloomberg: *walks around classroom with panty hose hanging out of the bottom of her pant leg (Who wears panty hose under jeans???? And how do you manage to get your panty hose on one leg but not the other so that it hangs out of your pants????)
Class: *laughs every time Frau Bloomberg walks by for about 20 minutes because no one wants to tell her for fear of a Frau freakout*
Mike: "Frau Bloomberg, you've got panty hose hanging out of your leg."
Frau Bloomberg: *looks confused and doesn't believe Mike*
Mike: "No, seriously, LOOK DOWN!"
Frau Bloomberg: *looks down and back up and sees nothing* "Michael, step out, step out of the room!"
Mike: "But, Frau Bloomberg, just look down!"
Frau Bloomberg: "GO!!!!"
(20 minutes later)
Frau Bloomberg: *looks at her shoes* "Hey, you know something, he was right." *lets Mike back in the room*
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